The life and times of me. Also known as: My quest to become more awesome.

Category Archives: Humor

My mom sent me this picture today and I just couldn’t stop laughing at it. I was sitting in my cubicle with tears coming out of my eyes. I just couldn’t shut it off.

I mean seriously:


Out of all of the celebrity mugshots I’ve ever seen, I have narrowed it down to the two most hilarious (in my opinion anyway).
1. Nick Nolte

2. Jason London


Which do you think is funnier? Is there one out there that you think is even better than either of these? Please share!

It’s just too much.


One of my favorite pastimes happens to be dressing up animals. Namely, my pets. Here is Bella in a squirrel costume:

And a bat costume:

I also have a Santa costume for her but no good pictures of her in it. I have a lot if other hats and hoodies and other random items of clothing for her as well. She hates them all. Patrick is a new addition to our household so I haven’t gotten him anything yet. Plus he’s growing really fast. I found this picture on twitter the other day though and have come to the conclusion that it is necessary to crochet one for him.

My searches online haven’t been very successful though. I’m going to have to try and fashion this myself. Who doesn’t love a kitty in a mushroom costume?!

At least here in WT land it is. I’m not some party pooper. I like fire crackers on the 4th of July and sometimes when a campfire is involved. I just don’t find them to be necessary every stinking night when the weather happens to be warm. I know it’s the 4th of July eve today but as I lay here relaxing, it sounds like a barrage of gunfire outside. Save it for tomorrow, folks. You won’t hear a peep out of me tomorrow. But today I complain. As I will on Friday. If people light off fire crackers and such all the damn time, don’t they lose their special-ness? Meh. Perhaps 33 is the age I turn into a curmudgeonly old woman. Next year you’ll find me in my lawn looking and sounding like Bea Arthur. I’ll be wearing a smart pantsuit with giant shoulder pads and shaking my fist in the air at the neighborhood children causing a ruckus like a bunch of damn hooligans. Sigh. I always thought I’d be Blanche. I guess I’m doomed to be Dorothy instead.

JW and I went out I get a bite to eat earlier and when we got home, a dude from one set of WT neighbors was across the street trying to fight a different dude from a separate set of WT neighbors. They were yelling about someone being a heroin addict and people needing to get off of their property. I couldn’t tell you who was who because I find it hard to tell them apart. Then Older Lady WT (my very least favorite of all of my hillbilly neighbors – she is just the worst) from across the street to join in the fun. I believe the “heroin addict” is her nephew. She was wasted. JW said he was going to call the cops so she started screaming profanities at him too. Meanwhile, the two who were trying to fight both took their shirts. Shit was getting real, yo. The police finally showed up and were forced to push Older Lady WT’s nephew to the ground, TWICE, and then she tried to get involved too and one of the officers had to pin her to the hood of the police car. Nephew was cuffed by this point and she was just put into the back of one o the squad cars. I went in the house and JW stuck around to speak with the cops. After it was all said and done, no one was arrested because “They’d just be out in a couple of hours anyway. The jails are overcrowded.”

Sigh. I can’t wait to move out to the middle of nowhere.

But hey, I was lamenting earlier about our lack of television. So at least I got a little real-life drama!