I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what I want to do with my life. I know a lot of people already have that figured out when they are way younger than me but unfortunately (or fortunately, depending how you look at it), I am not someone who was able to find direction and keep it at an early age. I am a notorious mind-changer. I don’t really think there’s anything terribly wrong with that but I suppose it has caused me some detriment in some areas of my life at some points. I like to think it has given me the opportunity to explore a variety of interests.
I went to college for a year and a half right after high school before I dropped out. At the time, I was a history major with a minor in English. I still really love those subjects. I got away from them because I wasn’t sure I wanted to be a teacher and honestly, I hated writing papers. I love writing. I just didn’t like having number-of-pages-requirements. It seems foolish now. I’ve always had a problem with authority.
After I dropped out, I waited tables for six years. I wouldn’t change that for anything. I met all of the people I still consider my best friends during that time. I partied and had a good time. I was reckless and it was so much fun. But I decided I couldn’t keep that up forever so I went back to school. I wasn’t exactly sure what I wanted to go into and my mom suggested I take a couple of horticulture classes since I always like working in the garden with my grandma when I was a kid. And I really enjoyed it. It interested me enough that I knew I’d be able to stick with it through graduation. And I did. The internship I completed the summer before my senior year left something to be desired and I wasn’t sure I necessarily wanted to do that stuff or a living but I had exactly 120 credits planned out and ready for graduation. So I finished up and graduated in 2009 with a bachelor of science. I figured a degree would get me places and at least I was fortunate enough to have studied something that truly interested me. I still use what I learned a a hobby, just not as a career.
After graduation, I moved to Florida and got a job as an admissions counselor. I was pretty good at it but I knew it wasn’t for me. I was also insanely homesick the entire time I lived there. So we moved back north, here, to Cincinnati. I went back to waiting tables for a while and picked up a temp job where I currently work. I was later hired on full time. I’ve also accepted a new position within the company since then. I like my new job. I really do. I go over information and look for factors and details that other people may have missed. I get to use my mind in a very analytical way and I’m good at it.
But here’s the thing. It doesn’t really fulfill me. And I’m not even that sure that I want a job to fulfill my life. I know that when the time comes, I’d really like to be a stay at home mom. If it happened now, it would not be possible. But maybe in the future. So I’ve been looking things other than my job that I can really get into.
Last year, it was homesteading. I was all but obsessed with it for several months. I wanted to grow and can a bunch of vegetables, go berry picking and make jam, and make my own cleaning supplies. I still want to do those things but I guess they’ve been put on the back burner for now. Next, it was cupcake baking. I love to bake. And if I do say so myself, I can make some delicious cupcakes. Next it was the business plan I have been working on. I’m still not ready to talk about exactly what that is all about yet. I have definitely been less invested in it lately. And now is the writing. I’ve only been doing this for a week now but I truly enjoy it. I’m excited to see what kind of voice I develop and what kinds of things I can think of to write about. I still am interested and do a lot of the things listed above. I just have a hard time sticking with some of the ideas long-term.
But I know, at this point, I want to be creative. Whether I can be creative and transition that into a way to help support my family or if it will just be more of a hobby has yet to be seen. And maybe I can find a way to combine the things I mentioned above (and more, I’m sure something new will catch my attention soon) into something that will work for me.
So I will continue to write. Daily. And I guess I’ll just see where it takes me. I don’t know what that will mean. But I do know that no matter what, it’s another adventure.